Thursday, February 14, 2013

makeup, the girl, and other things

Last night on the post (on facebook) about the girl being embarrassed at school over the eyeliner incident, I had someone tell me I should not let her wear eyeliner.  At first I wanted to have an internet caps lock fight, but I thought my best bet was to log off right away and go watch some comedy shows and sleep on it.  It was the first thing I thought about this morning when I woke up.  I would like to address it now.  Last night I wouldn't have been so nice about it.  The comment is gone.  I don't do internet drama.

Let me tell you a little something about this beautiful 14 yr old of mine.  If you have followed me for a while, you know she isn't my biological child.  You know we have her b/c her parents messed up and lost custody of her.  Because of the rough life she was forced to live she had absolutely no self esteem when we got her. 

Now she makes straight A's in school, tests above average on all her state tests, and only hangs around with nice girls.  She very easily could have gone in another direction. 
Yesterday she overheard a conversation on the bus.  The girl was talking about how bad her home life is, and how she was using drugs.  You know what my girl did?  First she texted me to ask who she should tell.  Then she waited for all the kids to get off the bus and she told the bus driver what the girl had said, because she didn't want any other kids to have to suffer at home the way that she did.  Most kids would have ignored that.

So the bottom line is, don't be a judgemental twit.  You don't know her story, and you don't know mine.  When we got her she was at least 20-30 pounds overweight because most of the food she ate was garbage.  That happens when you're cooking your own dinners at 8 years old.  It also happens when you're sitting at home lonely at that age, not knowing when your parents are going to come home or what condition they'll be in.  My girl can tell you some stories that will make your skin crawl, but she has risen above all that.  If she wants to wear a little eyeliner, lip gloss, and eye shadow to school after all she's been through, and that's the worst thing she's doing, I'd say I'm doing a pretty good freaking job.  Think before you hit that send button.  I delete and ban those keyboard warriors.        


  1. I think ur Gods gift to your girl :) and i commend you for raising and loving her ...i have been in simular shoes as her and i would have loved to have a angel like you in my younger years !

  2. Good gracious, at 14 they were giving you crap? I let my 11yo wear (very subtle) makeup out of the house, and would let her wear it to school. I let her glam it up as much as she wants at home. Since it's not taboo, she lost interest in it fairly quickly, and only very occasionally does it now. I have the same issue with self-esteem, my daughter has mild CP and I don't want anything else working against how she views herself. I'm fine with her shaving her legs/underarms, wearing a bit of makeup, having the "cool" the scheme of life these are negligible things. And kudos to your daughter for looking out for her peers...a lot of kids, like that one, don't have anyone else looking out for them, you should be very proud of your daughter.

  3. Thank you both! I am very proud of her. She's good people.

  4. She's good people because she has good people raising her. *hugs*